Staying Sane during Challenging Times with Alison Myners
By Holly Howe
Although Alison Myners is best known for her role as Chair of the Royal Academy Trust, she is also a trained psychotherapist. She shared her tips with our members for how we can stay sane during these turbulent Covid-19 times.
The new normal
Alison began by acknowledging that everything that we take for granted has been turned “topsy-turvy” during the pandemic. One of the key challenges for many people is the switch from working in an office to working from home, where many people are living with family members or flatmates and don’t have an existing office space in their house. She also noted that people who have been furloughed may be feeling resentful due to being cut off from their working environment and fearful about what is going to happen with their job, while those who are still working are dealing with challenges of a reduced workforce and lack of access to their work resources.
Uncertainty and fear
We need to accept that we are in a situation beyond our control and which doesn’t have a defined end. Social media can cause anxiety, as we see posts of people on holiday or seeming to have a good time. Those posts can make us think that “some people are absolutely untouched by the situation”, which may not be the case in reality, but can fuel a lack of self-worth.
People are naturally worry about losing work, as well as smaller things such as “losing that ability to stand before an artwork which we have absolutely taken for granted.” Many others may be dealing with grief and loss, not just of friends and loved ones, but also around issues such as lifestyle and work.
But there are many positives
Alison believes one of the key steps towards resilience is staying connected.
“I think it’s really important that we have an increased connectedness overall with our family, and our colleagues, although it’s not face-to-face. We now have time to do little things such as observing birthdays in a more thoughtful way… I think it’s important to take time to share your life and to listen and to support.”
Another positive outcome, though she admits it’s a more “flippant” issue, is that some people may have improved bank balances as people no longer have to buy new clothes for work or going out, and staying at home can mean we’re using less make-up!
“Shoes? I haven’t worn a high pair of shoes since February and I’m loving it and I can’t imagine how I’m ever going to squeeze my feet back into a high heel, but I certainly haven’t been buying any!”
She also sees that people are becoming increasingly kind and thoughtful: “I think that in some ways this has really made us think about how we are with others.” We are living in a shared experience and people have been coming together to support each other.
The importance of nutrition
Alison stressed the value of self-care, especially how it can relate to our physical well being through nutrition. While it’s tempting to hit up the carbs and sugary foods while we’re feeling low, she agreed that it’s ok to do that and enjoy it, but realise that it only gives you a temporary high and don’t make it a habit. Likewise with other substances: “I’m not saying don’t have a drink…I’m talking about excess. If you turn to alcohol, drugs, or tobacco, to fill feelings of sadness, loneliness, or anxiety, then that is the beginning of an addictive route. So you really need to watch that and absorb those feelings, sit with the discomfort and find other means of addressing those feelings.”
Alison recommended yoga, meditation, or even simple breathing exercises: “The basis of breathing exercises is that your exhalation must take longer than your inhalation. So if you’re inhaling for four, exhale for eight. Just doing that for a couple of minutes a day, or particularly when you’re anxious, will bring your heartbeat down and make you feel a lot calmer.”
Sleep is also incredibly important. You may find that your schedule has changed in these times, and that you’re doing less things in the evening now. But she said that it’s fine to go to bed earlier and get up earlier – just listen to your body and “make sure you get your sleep – that is the most important thing!”
Stay connected
While we may be seeing fewer people now, both friends and work colleagues, it is imperative to stay connected for our well-being.
“Use Zoom and video as much as you can because having face-to-face contact with people is far better than being at the end of the phone, particularly when we have less occasions to meet people. Take that time to share and to listen and to support others. And just remember that talking to people who have our best interests at heart makes us feel safe.”
She also recommended monitoring our media intake, especially around news about Covid-19 as that can increase our anxiety. She suggests choosing a few reliable sources – she likes the Guardian and the FT – and try not to check Covid updates more than twice a day. “Definitely don’t do it after dinner because it really does exacerbate that sort of not knowing and feeling of helplessness and hopelessness.”
Tips for working from home
Organise your workspace, decide on what your hours are going to be, and make time for breaks. Think about your soundscape: “Some people like to work to music, whatever it is that helps you to create a workspace that enables you to focus and give of your best means that you reduce your work time and it’s a bit less stressful.” Acknowledge that you may be less productive and that this is normal in this new environment.
Do new things!
A great way to maintain your mental health is to do the things you enjoy. While you may not be able to go to a gallery, join walk-throughs, art fora, and look at online shows. “Sign-up to clubs that you didn’t have time to do before and do activities that you really do enjoy.”
And don’t forget to laugh
It can be difficult to laugh when you’re not having face-to-face interactions but Alison recommends we avoid depressing movies and turn to lighter entertainment to cheer ourselves up. It’s also important to think about the people we surround ourselves with: “I think that if people are very toxic around you, try to create some sort of boundaries, you need positive things coming in at the moment.” And last but not least, don’t forget to exercise – even if that’s just going for a walk: “It is a known antidote to depression.”